In the early 80's G.I. Joe was simple, they were army guys instead of spacemen, and they had weapons that made sense. Ya know instead of some giant fucking robot that has a goddamn rock for a hand, they had the Whirlwind.
The Whirlwind is a bad ass machine gun, it had a chair for Rock N Roll, it could elevate, swivel and be towed by the Vamp. Speaking of Vamp's the new one is awesome as I can finally create a dio story where Rock n Roll and Clutch accidently kill a hooker and then they get Breaker drunk and make him take the blame. What with the four seats!
Back to the Whirlwind, it's computer breaks off easily and there's like four versions. There's one from Europe that's green and black, one from Argentina which is cheap and one from 2004. Fuck the HAL!
Another awesome thing was the JUMP. The JUMP is awesome because it's well built but mainly because it's really fucking far fetched but at the same time dudes'll be all "Look it's just a little advanced, but ya know it could work!" but then they'll be all "FUK THE TOON MAN, I DON'T WANT NO GODDAMN LAZERS!" It's funny to me!
Here is a photograph from our dear friend RTG, who is only affiliated with this site because I steal his images and he's all "Okay bro, but ya know I need links man!" Fuck you Roland, you ain't getting any!
Flash, I think the term is actually Giney Pig
That's a lot of sandbags.
ReplyDeleteWe wuz robbed of the Cobra whirlwind when Hasbro cancelled the Roc/Poc Target deluxe wave 3. But maybe we were better off. Craig got it. Then he died. Coincidence? Probably. (Sorry if that was tacky, we all miss him.)
ReplyDeleteWait a minute! Grand Slam flies the JUMP! You people want to forget he ever existed! He beat the shit out of Major BLUDD ON A BUS...HE'S COOL. I also knew a feller who got the POC Cobra Whirlwind and his damn head fell off.
ReplyDeleteCan't wait for the killed a hooker dio!
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