(Smash The State eats itself)

A figure review.

G.I. Joe is a pretty retarded thing, that really should've been dead and buried for 10 years at this point, however that is not the case, and we've been subject to A LOT of terrible things, such as everything from 2002-2006, that gay movie, Resolute, and a lot of other things I never actually paid attention to.

Occasionally however there is a G.I. Joe that still has THE STUFF. Today, Smash The State is going to discuss the most recent G.I. Joe that has THE STUFF, don't expect a lot of knowledge or wittiness because fuck you we don't care, and the best reviewer of G.I. Joe toys Last Best Angry Man is too busy driving his new car in the Alkali Flats

2011 Stalker is a rad as fuck figure, he doesn't look like a fucking cartoon, doesn't have bright colours, has a machete and above all else looks like a member of the Black Panther Party, I haven't seen anyone mention that, but it's probably because most white bread honky fuckers into G.I. Joe are thinking "Stalker is Snake Eyes and Tommy's best friend, he didn't kill cops or sell drugs in the 70's"

So basically buy this figure, it's a true throw back to the days of G.I. Joe being President Reagan's official gang, full of people from Ohio or high school dropouts (they're the same thing amirite)

Real Life G.I. Joes Part II

File Photo of a Racist, Christian Activist


"...a series of emails that show an influential evangelical activist with close ties to the Perry campaign stressing the political importance of “juxtaposing traditional Christianity to the false God of Mormonism,” and calling for a “clarion call to Evangelical pastors and pews” that will be “the key to the primary” for Perry.

The activist in question is David Lane, a conservative Christian power broker who directed fundraising for Perry’s August prayer rally "


“Lane is the mysterious, behind the scenes, evangelical kingmaker who stormed into Iowa in 2008 and tilted the whole thing from Romney to Huckabee.”



What in the fuck is Sure Fire's problem?

NHL PREDICTIONS 2011

THE COMPLETE PUSSIFICATION OF A ONCE NOBLE SPORT

http://angelfire.com/80s/punk&joe.shtml

This is the only known screengrab of the ORIGINAL STS website circa 1998, after abandoning a print zine because "That fucking kraut at the print shop in Bay Port can't take a fucking joke" and the desire to "Step into the fucking grid, man, it's 1998" Smash The State had a website cooler then the original General Hawk site.

Right after it's second update, Dr. Henry E. Miller went to go live in the woods till 2005 and Johnny Turk did "A bunch of rad stuff"

Hero Worship.

On June 12th 1994 We lock a remarkable Soul.......Voice actor Chris Latta (best known for his voicework as Cobra Commander on SUNBOW'S G.I.JOE).

Every year my club holds a moment of silence in honour and memory of MR. LATTA.


This year on June 12th at Noon (Central time U.S.) we'll hold 3 minutes of silence to honour MR. Latta.

And we'd like for you to join us, and honour his memory.


Remarkable Soul = shitty stand-up comic?

Playing dress up (Guns with orange caps, and the overweight)

A child from make a wish foundation gets to go to Disney ok? What does this child see? His or her Heroes.. Mickey, Minnie, Goofy , Donald and the gang right? They might not have a tomorrow as I had stated in a previous post.

Now... A form of this happened with us as I also stated... had a boy in a wheelchair from this foundation roll up and we were asked if we could have a photo taken.. the boy's fav character had been Flint... It isn't about the cosplaying RPG ... It is about making fans like the both of you to take home a lasting memory.. When that boy see's a Flint character He can say'' Hey! I know that guy! I shook his hand! He told me He'd always fight for my freedom, where ever there's trouble!" Just a simple hand shake... means a world of difference to someone who might not have much of a tomorrow to look forward to.

Now for !!SE!!.. what he did for the kids and other fans alike was into seriously interacting with them.. LLC did this as well. A boy went to pose with SnakeLLC and the look on his face was worth more then the price of a full attendee package. Words cannot express what that boy felt holding one of Snake's Katana's and posing with him to defend against a possible onslaught of Cobra troopers! YOU say your imagination works differently? so do those fans who got a chance to meet their favorite Joes. That boy went home with a memory of.. I met Snake eyes!

That is why we do what we do. Without characters to physically talk to and have fun with... what good is it? Hasbro backed our ideas and many of them were estatic that we were there to represent Jinx, Snake-Eyes, Storm Shadow, Lowlight, Zarana and Covergirl.. We did it for the backbone of the convention."


That's the rantings of the deranged minds of some creep who dresses up like a goddamned toy. Dressing up in lobbies of 2 star hotel convention centres isn't it.



War Machine.

I don't know what the fuck this is. Underneath a horrible Rap-Metal song with such poignant lyrics as "DON'T THINK ABOUT IT, ACT UPON IT", is what appears to be some assholes dressed up as army guys and running around some Central American torture hole stopping TERRORISTS from their underage girl kidnapping ring. Or something. Also Duke is some William Hopper looking prick who sure hates trees.



There's also something that was probably recorded a lot earlier than the box office hunk-a-junk known as Rise Of Cobra



I just wanna know how someone convinced there Dad to play a character. Roadblock is from Ghana, apparently, and is pretty terrible at rhyming since he rhymed "Ass" with "Ass".


I understand, that G.I. Joe fans are generally less interested in anything that isn't "Just like the good old days!" or "Action packed thrill rides" but christ isn't there something less obnoxious to do? Like Grunt getting PTSD and getting kicked out of the army and driving through that ghetto known as "Ohio" or some shit.

Another post about Hisstank (with more creepy imagery)

We here at Smash The State have wasted A LOT of time explaining how G.I. Joe fans are generally awful people, ya know misogynistic creeps, fat dudes, fundamentalist Christians, and dudes who listen to heavy metal. The greatest way to find this out is to take a visit to the 'Stank, there's all sorts of fuck ups there! From Jr0d to Unclassified (The dude who threatened to beat up Last Best Angry Man at a G.I. Joe convention in the previous post) and a guy who's just as fucked up as those two clowns!

Weezus.

Weezus is a guy who has a stupid haircut and used to brag on HISS Tank about how he always got into fights and was super tough. Usually when someone brags about how much they fight, and they're on the internet, it's obvious that they're lying! However Weezus also posted pictures of him looking like the victim of a good ol' fashion fag drag! Turns out he was a backyard wrestler.


A real ass appearance by the Doctor


Well, today I saw our dear friend Weezus was asking about the legality of a t-shirt. Well this is the t-shirt:




I hope he goes to jail!